Good Intentions, pt 5
A Note by Samantha Knies Gray
As of May 1st, I’m officially 3 years into owning Fire Horse Yoga … AND we’re officially 3 years into our current space. FHY was on The Jasper Square for 20+ years, but we moved into our current location a month after I took over. Some day, I’ll write about how about we made it into our current space; it was all very serendipitous, and I have a fun connection to our beautiful old building. Today, however, I’m updating you on those good intentions I’ve set for myself.
When I purchased the studio, I was completely burned out on my job at the time and needed a change. I was hopeful I could grow the studio to be sustainable, and maybe, some day make it my full-time gig. In the time since May 2021, I’ve ran it and taught literally thousands of classes while working a full time job, 2 part-time jobs and then 1 part-time job, managing a horse farm, finishing up our house (it’s still not finished! LOL), managing my mom’s health, managing a chronic health issue of my own, raising two little girls, volunteering for literally everything from 4H and horse shows to school events and Junior Achievement. All with a husband who works out of town and travels out-of-state often for his job. The biggest question I always get is how do I do it all. And my answer is always “with the best of intentions.”
I have a tendency to think I’m capable of doing all the things (and almost always without asking for help), but the truth is, I’m not. I’m one person with many different roles and sometimes, one or two roles have to stick out a little bigger than the other. Things get dropped and forgotten, people disappointed, and I get worn out. My house is often a mess (don’t let my personal Insta page fool you!), I’m almost always covered in dog hair with 5-day unwashed hair of my own, and we’ve become really adept at making full meals in our air-fryer who I’ve lovingly named ‘Flora’.
Earlier this year, I found myself again in an absolute awful burned-out state of too much and completely panicked that I’m missing out on valuable time with my girls (12 and 8). So, in this season of summer break … when we’re not rushing from one activity to the next and my schedule isn’t dictated by school drop-off and pick-up and homework and with the studio as my only job (!!) … I’ve allowed myself to shed even more of the unnecessary pressure I put on myself to do it all in order to focus on GrayGirl Days. I have at least 2 days/week carved out in my calendar especially for them, and we are having an absolute blast together. It often feels to me like a rebirth of motherhood, and I want to be present for it. They have officially declared it The Best Summer Ever™.
Sometimes I worry that this could be my last summer of freedom with them, so I’m living it with the best of intentions to leave the housework, make the pet hair a permanent part of my wardrobe, and enjoy those GrayGirls while I’ve still got their attention.
My class theme for the month, you might be asking? I dropped the ball on that one while I planned a 7th birthday party picnic for Isla’s Ellie the Stuffed Elephant. (Just kidding — not about the stuffed animal birthday, please see pic above — I always have a theme.) This month we’ll explore the art of accepting what is, letting go of what will not be, and intention-setting to deepen our practice on and off our mats.
Oh yea … and those skunks from last month’s newsletter? Jan L — you were right. They are an absolute blessing. The little family of 5 has taken up permanent residence inside Fairview Stables and the babies come out to play with us during barn chores every night. I know they’ll eventually move on, but for now: Welcome to the family, little ones.